When your boyfriend takes you for granted, you feel it. I doubt it’s your imagination. He very well may be doing just that, taking you for granted. Before you cast a finger his way though, really examine if you could be a contributor to this fact. Sometimes we have unrealistic expectations. We often feel a man should show us more, in his mind, it might not be this way at all.
Linda was dating Mike. Mike and Linda get along well, but Linda just started doing random things for Mike without Mike asking her to. She heard him say he was out of dog food, she was at the grocery, she just picked some up. He said thank you. Few days later, she washed all of his dishes up, he didn’t ask her too, she just did it. The good deeds started adding up and Linda sort of started keeping a silent score. Mike on the other hand sees it as he didn’t ask for it and may even be uncomfortable about it. Now he thinks, oh God, Linda is going to start expecting me to do these things for her. It doesn’t work that way.
One thing is for sure though regardless, if he is taking you for granted, nagging, talking, asking him what’s wrong, arguing, telling him how you feel will NOT fix it. If you are telling your boyfriend that he is taking you for granted, you are wasting you breath. You have to show him, not tell him. When you tell him what he is or isn’t doing, it feels like blame placing to him.
When he feels blamed, he also may begin to feel it’s difficult to make you happy. Men really do want to make you happy. If it begins to feel difficult, a lot of men just stop trying and this leaves you feeling taken for granted.
You can’t always change him, but you can change yourself and how you look at things. Start investing into yourself and treating yourself the way you wished he would treat you. If you don’t feel appreciated when you do something for him, stop the doing. Back off from the actions that contribute. Those things that you are looking for him to fill you up, start doing them for yourself.
As you begin to realize that you are responsible ultimately for your own happiness, your expectations for what you feel he should be doing naturally drop. If you feel like he takes you for granted, stop doing for him and do for yourself what makes you happy. A happy woman has a natural appeal to men and they are drawn to her.
As you begin to invest more into yourself than in him, he will notice. He will feel the change and this also take the pressure or the blame feeling away. He now feels safer with you. A man has to feel safe to open up on a deeper level and share with you. If he doesn’t feel he is responsible for your happiness, it becomes easier and more natural for him to come closer. If he feels safe, comes closer, it’s only natural he won’t continue to take you for granted as he now knows you are fine, with or without him.